Na-confine ang nagiisa kong pamangkin three days ago, ngayon ang labas niya. Of course we won't sacrifice his saftey, Kaya naman sa pinaka expensive na hospital namin siya dinala dito sa Marikina. Akala ko hindi hindi ko mararamdaman kung paano maramdaman ng isang magulang ang labis na pag-alala at pagmamahal sa kanyang anak. Well ngayon alam ko na ang pakiramdam at nakakarelate na ako. Halos madurog ang puso ko ng malaman kong Mild dengue, pnuemonia at uti. ang sanhi ng mataas nyang lagnat at pagsusuka.
Gumaling na sana sana siya ng lubusan. Yun lang ang mahihiling ko ngayong malapit na birthday ko. Wala nakong mahihiling pang iba. Mabait ang Diyos at alam kong proprotektahan niya ang mga Anghel niya.
Saturday, September 29, 2012
Wednesday, September 19, 2012
three
Day One: Umatend ako ng Geb ng isang clan. Dahil lasing na ay hindi ko sinasadya na may maka landian. Inshort MU na kami. Walang nangyari, kiss kiss lang. Pero muntik ng may mangyari sa car niya. Dapat mag-check in kami, pero masyado na kaming pagod at lasing. Muntik pa nga siyang mabanga dahil sa kaantukan.
Day two: Habang active ang communication namin ni number one ay hindi niya alam na nagtungo ako sa P1 kinagabihan. May nakilala akong mag babarkada, Dalawa sa kanila ang nagpakilala sa akin at pareho nilang kinuha ang number ko. Umalis na ang magbabarkada at dalawa nalang kaming natira. Nag-check in kami. MU narin kami.
Day Three: Habang pareho kung pinagsasabay ang dalawa sa txt ay tumawag ang Barkada ni number two. Napapunta tuloy ako ng Maykawayan Bulacan upang mag-overnight at get to know each other. Langhiya nagkaligaw ligaw pa ako. May nangyari. Undetermined kami ni number three, kumbaga unknown ang status.
Day four: Nasa Manila na ako, nagkagulo na si number three at two samantalang si number one walang kaalam alam. Kinagabihan ay inamin ko na kay number one. Okay lang daw sa kanya pero. Pero sabi ko friends nalang that I don't deserve him. The truth is I dont have any feelings for him.
Inamin ko narin kay number two ang lahat. " Yun daw ang choice ko bahala nadaw ako ". We decided to be friends. After ng short pagtatalo via txt ay dinedma ko nalang siya.
Pinili ko si number Three dahil siya ang pina goodlooking at alam niya lahat ng nangyayari. After a day ng communication nag-fade na siya. Hindi na lang siya bigla nagparamdam. In short- di nump nya ako.
While kami ni number one at two nawalan narin ng communication shortly. Dati sinabi ko sa sarili ko na hindi ko ito magagawa, sa desperasyon makahanap ng pag-ibig ay nagmadali ako at naging wild. In the end may nasaktan, nasaktan din ako at naguluhan. Hindi ko na ulit gagawin ito.
This is last December 2011.
Hindi ako nagmamaganda at lalong hindi ako nagbabanal-banalan.
This is last December 2011.
Hindi ako nagmamaganda at lalong hindi ako nagbabanal-banalan.
Tuesday, September 18, 2012
cat man
But bago ko siya tuluyang itapon sa bakod ay umagaw sakin ang isang huni ng ibon. Paglingon ko ay sabay talon ng itim na pusa na laging tumatambay sa bakuran namin, Sabay sakmal sa ibon na sigurado akong hindi Sparrow, medyo mahaba ang buntot ng ibon at hindi niya kasukat ang normal na Maya bird, hindi ko lang sure ang kulay.Madilim na eh Sana lang nakunan ko ng picture. It was too quick anyways. I like That male cat if I could just only talk to him and ask him if he could be my pet. To guard our house of unwanted rodents. But unfortunately my father hates cats to death. Kasi lagi kaming inuunahan sa ulam.
Monday, September 17, 2012
Friday, September 14, 2012
like a million times
Dahil sa sigarilyo ay matagal ko ng binalak na magparehab. Ngunit mahal yoon at alam ko na parang napaka babaw na dahilan ang yosi. Kaya naman, pagsasamantalahan ko ang aking bakasyon, para itigil ang mga evil vices ganda ko. Isang bagay ako labis na mahihirapan, isa sa mga biggest challenges ko. Yan ang pag stop sa paninigarilyo. Sa ngayon, Everyday nag struggle ako. I tried to quit like a million times. Like last night naka isang kaha ako habang nakikipaginuman. Shet diba. Powta, hindi nako naawa sa katawan kong isang bulate nalang ang hindi pumipirma.Naniniwala ako na tao rin lang at wala ng iba ang makakagawa ng milagro sa mga buhay nila. Kasing imposible ng isang milagro ang pag-quiquit ko mag smoke. Pero susubukan ko ng abot ng aking makakaya. Pak! Isa pa sa pinagtataka ko ay maski na sobrang sakit na ng lungs ko eh tuloy parin ako sa paghithit.
Dalawa lang ang pagpipilian ko buhay ko o komplikasyon.
Thursday, September 13, 2012
green butterfly
It was yesterday when I was waiting for a tropa outside of TP. Sasamahan ko kasi siya kunin ang backpay niya from our previous company. While waiting sitting outside of Starbucks ay napansin ko ang isang dalaginding. Ang unang nakaagaw ng pansin ko ay ang clip niya sa buhok niya na parang tunay na butterfly. It was a green butterfly and as she walks ay nag fla-flap ang wings nito.
The girls is big, like fat and she was quite tall. Pansin ko rin naka Mascara ang eyes niya. Kulay champurado ang skin tone niya. Shes wearing a girly top and white leggings ang a pretty tiny bag to compliment her get up. Shes not pretty to say the least.
While observing her and while my eyes are fixated sa green butterfly sa buhok niya ay biglaan siyang tumingin sa salamin. Nanalamin siya sa bintana ng Tp. And she smiled sweetly on her own reflection. Then she continued walking.
Then and then na realize ko that this girl believed that she is beautiful. By the way she acted and her movement I judged her to be a real beautiful person. Becuase I know that she believe in herself.
Why am I writing about her? It's because its been a very long time since I felt that I am beautiful. Infact pag nasa Mall ako or public places ay hindi ako makatingin sa salamin, because everytime I look at a miror ay nakikita ko ang isang taong sagad sa panget that no one could ever love. Hindi ako kumportableng manalamin ng may kasabay, nagagawa ko lang ito pag tipsy ako.
Wednesday, September 12, 2012
the purest of pain
Dear Gregory,
Nung minsan hiniling ko na naramdaman ko ulit ang mag mahal.
Nagkatotoo yung hiling ko.
Nayon ko lang nagawang lumuhod at mag maka-awang, wag akong-iwan.
Ngayon ko lang naranasan na sabihan sa mukha ko na, ni minsan hindi magiging kami.
Paulit-ulit kong pinagamit ang katawan ko, sa pag-aakalang mamahalin rin niya ako.
Ngunit mali ang relasyon namin. Meron siya at kabit lang ako.
"Ano namang akala mo? Ipagpapalit ko siya sayo?"
Para niyang paulit-ulit na dinuraan ang mukha ko.
Yun ang mga huling salitang sanabi niya sakin.
Pagkatapos ng maraming bote ng RedHorse, Kaha-kahang Malboro Reds at isang baldeng luha.
Ako'y muling bumangon.
Nakatatak na sa kaluluwa ang karanasang, nagturo saking ng matinding leksyion, nagturo sakin maging-Gaga, Maging-tao. Nagturo saking magmahal muli.
Ngayon ko lang naranasan maging ganito kagaga.
Sobrang gwapo naman niya kasi.
[ this was a post from my previous blog, ages ago ]
Nung minsan hiniling ko na naramdaman ko ulit ang mag mahal.
Nagkatotoo yung hiling ko.
Nayon ko lang nagawang lumuhod at mag maka-awang, wag akong-iwan.
Ngayon ko lang naranasan na sabihan sa mukha ko na, ni minsan hindi magiging kami.
Paulit-ulit kong pinagamit ang katawan ko, sa pag-aakalang mamahalin rin niya ako.
Ngunit mali ang relasyon namin. Meron siya at kabit lang ako.
"Ano namang akala mo? Ipagpapalit ko siya sayo?"
Para niyang paulit-ulit na dinuraan ang mukha ko.
Yun ang mga huling salitang sanabi niya sakin.
Pagkatapos ng maraming bote ng RedHorse, Kaha-kahang Malboro Reds at isang baldeng luha.
Ako'y muling bumangon.
Nakatatak na sa kaluluwa ang karanasang, nagturo saking ng matinding leksyion, nagturo sakin maging-Gaga, Maging-tao. Nagturo saking magmahal muli.
Ngayon ko lang naranasan maging ganito kagaga.
Sobrang gwapo naman niya kasi.
[ this was a post from my previous blog, ages ago ]
Tuesday, September 11, 2012
someone who undertands me
This entry was written by my friend, Souljacker/Mugen. Mugen, I'm sorry hindi nako nakapagpaalam na I-po-post ko ito. Nakakarelate lang ako sa situation nato' ngayon. Its like history is repeating itself again. I really wish that I could write as good as you, Sis : ) Thank you for this post. Even the exact date is documented. I've met a few people in my life which is Mga Disente. Which Is Sis whos one of them.
June 10 2007
"I have no more friends," Princess told me the other day while smoking a stick of Marlboro Lights during a coffee break.
"What happened?" I asked him, feeling concerned about his situation.
He never told me the exact details due to the sensitivity of his conflict. But from the impressions he hinted, it seems like there was
a tampuhan between him and his straight barkada. To show how proud he was despite being the odd guy, he decided to part ways
with them and did a soloflight since last Friday.
To show my sympathy, I immediately made an arrangements to be his uwian buddy. I also became his yosi partner since before the
conflict started, he used to take breaks with them when the opportunity arises.
---
So far things are looking good between us. Being the only guy he talks to, I am beginning to discover how similar our interests are
in so many ways. No wonder, Mami Athena once remarked that Princess and I are like sisters to her. My conversations with
Princess reveal that despite my initial impressions of him being the most fashion-oriented and war-freakl among the PLUs I know in
the floor, beneath those pettiness reveals a deeper person worth exploring.
On our first uwian alone, Princess told me that if he is a girl, he would be a very bitchy one. Jokingly, I told him that if he was born
to be a bitchy lady, with his looks and appeal, he might have hooked up with the hunkiest guy his eyes could cast on. Being aware
of my own femininity, I told him that if ever I'd be a girl, I'm not the type who would be wearing a pink skirt and a petite blouse,
instead I'd be the koboy-type. Most likely, I'd be seen walking under the scorching sun without any complains or making sabit on a
jeepney estribo just to get home on time.
This morning, we talked about music - particularly the ones that he likes. It turned out that aside from Celine Dion and Britney
Spears, he also listens to Tori Amos and Shawn Mullins. When I played the song Lullaby yesterday (since I was the dj of the floor), he
immediately sent me an MSN message just to tell that he loved the song that I was playing. I replied that Shawn Mullins is just one of
my favorites. That simple conversation lead to our common belief that the kind of music that catches our appeal are the light,
indie ones that doesn't receive much airtime on the radio.
However, our conversation never stopped there.
Since I told him that the reason why I came late, also this morning, was because I slept very late last night. He asked me if I suffer
from insomnia. I told him that I don't really have problems sleeping - except when I stumble on a good documentary on Discovery
Planet or National Geographic. To my surprise, he said that those are the only two channels he watches on cable. Ironically, the
best TV program for him is the same TV program that forced me to clutch my blanket even closer to my body last night. No matter
how freaky it was to be alone in the room, I watched the docu-drama series, A Haunting on NGC until 2 am in the morning.
---
Our similarities never stopped there.
From the cartoons that we both like, to the color that immediately catches our eyes, it seems like we are the alter-ego of one
another. What I lacked in finesse and sense of culture (or fashion, for that matter) - he provides to me, while his lack of bruteness
and strength is the one I cover. We're both creative and artistically inclined enough to appreciate each other's works and our
solitary nature meant that we both understand how each other's mind works. Ever since we struck an alliance at Bed two weeks
ago, my respect for him has increased two-fold. It was further boosted when he expressed his sympathy and disgust with regards
to my previous conflict in the office last summer. Perhaps, this expression of sympathy was the same reason why I immediately
threw my support when he told me about the issues he had with his tropa.
For sure, my secretive nature and sudden obvious closeness to Princess would stir a new rumor in the floor. However, this time I
have prepared myself for the possible barrage of intrigues that may come, if things aren't clear to my new companion.
Forewarning Princess, he is aware of how we're being talked about behind our backs. Good thing, he doesn't mind it at all. What's
important for him is that he is enjoying my company (and the new-found freedom he got) and that's all that matters to him.
Nevertheless, despite the apparent advantage I get from gaining a new work/gimik companion, I'm always open to the possibility
that it will just a temporary set-up.
I for one, works behind Princess' back to patch up the tampuhan between him and his tropa. A friendship spanning from childhood
to adulthood is something that shouldn't be thrown away easily. To keep my neutrality intact, I never asked him or his friends how
the conflict started. Princess wouldn't reveal to me the details, while his friends simply said that he just walked away for no reason
at all.
Bearing the lessons (and pains) I've learned from the "Big Hit," I told both parties never to burn a bridge that has spanned decades.
"Isipin niyo na lang yung malalim na pinagsamahan niyo," I told them whenever the tampuhan would be brought up in conversations.
Weeks will pass and the misunderstandings that divided them will be patched up as if nothing happened. So long as I keep my
cordiality to Princess' original tropa, hopefully, it wouldn't take too long before both parties realize how petty it was to turn their
backs from a good friendship.
Soon, everything will be back to normal and I might be humming my way back home alone again. But despite such solitary
possibilities, I guess I had already made a mark on Princess' life in many ways that I have never imagined before. Being in the same
account at work, our alliance ensures that we would watch each other's back in case the other operators decide to gang-up on us.
Since we have become uwian buddies, it may lead to countless night-outs and hang-outs only the two of us could only appreciate.
Lastly, because our interests surprisingly complement one another, it may further encourage our creative abilities through each
other's mutual support.
The possibilities of influencing each other's lives are actually endless.
And I'm glad that he came, in a time when lost is imminent to befall on me again.
June 10 2007
"I have no more friends," Princess told me the other day while smoking a stick of Marlboro Lights during a coffee break.
"What happened?" I asked him, feeling concerned about his situation.
He never told me the exact details due to the sensitivity of his conflict. But from the impressions he hinted, it seems like there was
a tampuhan between him and his straight barkada. To show how proud he was despite being the odd guy, he decided to part ways
with them and did a soloflight since last Friday.
To show my sympathy, I immediately made an arrangements to be his uwian buddy. I also became his yosi partner since before the
conflict started, he used to take breaks with them when the opportunity arises.
---
So far things are looking good between us. Being the only guy he talks to, I am beginning to discover how similar our interests are
in so many ways. No wonder, Mami Athena once remarked that Princess and I are like sisters to her. My conversations with
Princess reveal that despite my initial impressions of him being the most fashion-oriented and war-freakl among the PLUs I know in
the floor, beneath those pettiness reveals a deeper person worth exploring.
On our first uwian alone, Princess told me that if he is a girl, he would be a very bitchy one. Jokingly, I told him that if he was born
to be a bitchy lady, with his looks and appeal, he might have hooked up with the hunkiest guy his eyes could cast on. Being aware
of my own femininity, I told him that if ever I'd be a girl, I'm not the type who would be wearing a pink skirt and a petite blouse,
instead I'd be the koboy-type. Most likely, I'd be seen walking under the scorching sun without any complains or making sabit on a
jeepney estribo just to get home on time.
This morning, we talked about music - particularly the ones that he likes. It turned out that aside from Celine Dion and Britney
Spears, he also listens to Tori Amos and Shawn Mullins. When I played the song Lullaby yesterday (since I was the dj of the floor), he
immediately sent me an MSN message just to tell that he loved the song that I was playing. I replied that Shawn Mullins is just one of
my favorites. That simple conversation lead to our common belief that the kind of music that catches our appeal are the light,
indie ones that doesn't receive much airtime on the radio.
However, our conversation never stopped there.
Since I told him that the reason why I came late, also this morning, was because I slept very late last night. He asked me if I suffer
from insomnia. I told him that I don't really have problems sleeping - except when I stumble on a good documentary on Discovery
Planet or National Geographic. To my surprise, he said that those are the only two channels he watches on cable. Ironically, the
best TV program for him is the same TV program that forced me to clutch my blanket even closer to my body last night. No matter
how freaky it was to be alone in the room, I watched the docu-drama series, A Haunting on NGC until 2 am in the morning.
---
Our similarities never stopped there.
From the cartoons that we both like, to the color that immediately catches our eyes, it seems like we are the alter-ego of one
another. What I lacked in finesse and sense of culture (or fashion, for that matter) - he provides to me, while his lack of bruteness
and strength is the one I cover. We're both creative and artistically inclined enough to appreciate each other's works and our
solitary nature meant that we both understand how each other's mind works. Ever since we struck an alliance at Bed two weeks
ago, my respect for him has increased two-fold. It was further boosted when he expressed his sympathy and disgust with regards
to my previous conflict in the office last summer. Perhaps, this expression of sympathy was the same reason why I immediately
threw my support when he told me about the issues he had with his tropa.
For sure, my secretive nature and sudden obvious closeness to Princess would stir a new rumor in the floor. However, this time I
have prepared myself for the possible barrage of intrigues that may come, if things aren't clear to my new companion.
Forewarning Princess, he is aware of how we're being talked about behind our backs. Good thing, he doesn't mind it at all. What's
important for him is that he is enjoying my company (and the new-found freedom he got) and that's all that matters to him.
Nevertheless, despite the apparent advantage I get from gaining a new work/gimik companion, I'm always open to the possibility
that it will just a temporary set-up.
I for one, works behind Princess' back to patch up the tampuhan between him and his tropa. A friendship spanning from childhood
to adulthood is something that shouldn't be thrown away easily. To keep my neutrality intact, I never asked him or his friends how
the conflict started. Princess wouldn't reveal to me the details, while his friends simply said that he just walked away for no reason
at all.
Bearing the lessons (and pains) I've learned from the "Big Hit," I told both parties never to burn a bridge that has spanned decades.
"Isipin niyo na lang yung malalim na pinagsamahan niyo," I told them whenever the tampuhan would be brought up in conversations.
Weeks will pass and the misunderstandings that divided them will be patched up as if nothing happened. So long as I keep my
cordiality to Princess' original tropa, hopefully, it wouldn't take too long before both parties realize how petty it was to turn their
backs from a good friendship.
Soon, everything will be back to normal and I might be humming my way back home alone again. But despite such solitary
possibilities, I guess I had already made a mark on Princess' life in many ways that I have never imagined before. Being in the same
account at work, our alliance ensures that we would watch each other's back in case the other operators decide to gang-up on us.
Since we have become uwian buddies, it may lead to countless night-outs and hang-outs only the two of us could only appreciate.
Lastly, because our interests surprisingly complement one another, it may further encourage our creative abilities through each
other's mutual support.
The possibilities of influencing each other's lives are actually endless.
And I'm glad that he came, in a time when lost is imminent to befall on me again.
Monday, September 10, 2012
ribbon
Mga kaibigan kong pinagkatiwalaan nang many many years. I don't really understand why they do this to me. Nang dahil sa pera, Ng dahil sa cellphone ay nawawalan na ako ng tiwala sa kanila. You see, I have known then for many years now and I am not pertaining to one person. I know that they are having a hard time and I am too. Naniniwala ako na " True Bestfriends understand each other and not take advantage of each other". Alam ko na ngayon na maraming nasisira ang pera including your relationship sa mga kinokonsider mong true friends. Totoo pala yung kasabihihan nayun.
Ang mahirap pa na ako pa ngayon ang lumalabas na masama dahil sa dalas kong maningil sa kanila. FYI lang sila ang hindi sumusunod sa usapan. Ilang beses ko ng inudjust ang petsa. At alam rin nilang kailangan ko ng pera. Ako ang dehado dito.One of them even labeled me as not being a true friend. Well really? Who really needs you? FYI lang I can survive without anyone. Alam namam nilang bills don't ever stop maliban nalang kung nakatira ka sa kweba o taong bundok ka.
I want my money, my phone back. I'm sorry I don't really care if they want me back.
Ayoko na talagang mag-pautang ang I don't want to make another friend and thats a promise.
Ang mahirap pa na ako pa ngayon ang lumalabas na masama dahil sa dalas kong maningil sa kanila. FYI lang sila ang hindi sumusunod sa usapan. Ilang beses ko ng inudjust ang petsa. At alam rin nilang kailangan ko ng pera. Ako ang dehado dito.One of them even labeled me as not being a true friend. Well really? Who really needs you? FYI lang I can survive without anyone. Alam namam nilang bills don't ever stop maliban nalang kung nakatira ka sa kweba o taong bundok ka.
I want my money, my phone back. I'm sorry I don't really care if they want me back.
Ayoko na talagang mag-pautang ang I don't want to make another friend and thats a promise.
Sunday, September 9, 2012
thinking of you
Daniel: Love me now or i'll go crazyHim: You know I can't, I have a lover right?
* Kulang nalang sabihin niya na mabaliw na lang ako.
Yet once again another bold move...
Yet once again I felt a sharp stab in my heart...
Yet once again I cried hard.
You see, You see, You see, You see...
I've been depressed for a very long time and now pain. I'm okay, nothing's broken but my heart.
Kinain ko rin ang sinabi ko na I will never fall in love again.
I'm only human and I can take back whatever I have written in this blog.
Sometimes I just wish that I could pull out my heart, for me to not feel anything anymore.
But I have to accept the fact that the heart is part of me..part of my body.
The reason I wrote about him is to immortalize him forever in my heart.
Dahil gwapo talaga siya, gym fit macho at malaki ang kargada. He's a perfect 10, kinulang lang mediyo sa height 5"5 lang siya.
This is for you Gerald, masaya narin ako dahil natikman kita ng bongang bonga.
Saturday, September 8, 2012
nothing really matters
It was my lunch break. 2.am. I was in the pantry munching corn. Nagkumpulan ang mga agents habang pinapanood ang mga first videos ng kalamidad sa Japan. Lalo pang nadagdagan ang stress ko knowing that sobrang lapit sa faultline ng bahay namin. ( Marikina Fault line ). Parang eksena sa 2012 na movie ang mga videos. Humirit ang isang agent. " That's it guys, December 21, 2012 nalang ang mundo! ". " Shet ano kaba huwag kang ganyan! ". Wika ng isang bilat. Kung ganoon ang lagay, meron nalang pala akong 9 months and 1 year para, I-enjoy ang buhay. At that moment, I never felt that paranoid. Gusto ko nang tumalon mula sa 22nd floor kung saan ako naroroon.
Low and dry
It's been ages since I had my last meteor shower. Lately I have this urge to do it. I need some human touch, I need some affection, I need some sugar. I need some kilig, gusto ko ng Cynthia Patag moments, with matching stufftoy and a large ribbon sa buhok.
One of the boys
Nakakatuwa na nagwagwapuhan ang mga wavemates ko, konte lang ang gurls. Kaya naman isa ito sa dahilan kaya pumapasok pa ako. Sa grupo ay ako yung silent but deadly type, wala naman silang palag. Akala nga nila nung una pipe ako, pero sa totoo lang ay isa akong pepe na nagpapangap na titi. Masarap kasama ang boys sa yosi break at inuman, masarap tumawa at makinig sa pambabastos nila sa isat-isa. Hindi ko alam kung bakit takot silang biruin ako, wether or not bina-backstab nila ako, i really don't care. Ilang tumbling nalang ay madidisband na ang wave namin at madidistribute na kami sa ibat-ibang teams. Sarap magtrabaho pag- napapaligiran ka ng mga gwapo, nakakabawas ng stress, at nandyan narin yung occassional kilig sa pekpek pag-inaakbayan ka. Sarap magfinger sa restroom afterwards.
Wierdo umacting itong isang cutie pie, napapnsin ko na kung nasaan ako nandun siya. Hindi naman ako nag-aasume ng kung ano paman. Isa pa sa pinagtataka ko ay nag-stutter siya pag kausap ako. Malamang ay kinikilabutan siya sa pagmumukha ko. Mukha daw akong tomboy sabi nung isang baklang wavemate namin. Dedma lang ako, at least mukha lang ang tomboy. Mabait naman siya in fairness. Masaya kasama ang boys kasi, they like to front stab, they rarely backstab, mas balahura ang mga jokes nila kaya masaya.
21
Wave 21 ( pang 21 na grupo ). Sa second week ng training ay 21 nalang kaming natira naliggwak ang anim ( originally 27 kami ). Nung araw na nagtangalan ay pang 21 akong nagmock- call, yun kasi ang nabunot kong number. Feb, 21. 12:30 a.m ng maka- barge ko ang isang machong papa.
Hindi siya ang original kong ka barge nung oras na yun, kung hindi yung bakla kong ka wavemate. Babae ang ka barge ko. Nainis si baklang wavemate dahil hindi siya pinapansin ni matchong papa. Ni hello wala, naantipatikohan siya.
" daniel palit tayo, ang antipatiko nitong binabarge ko, hindi manlang ako tinitingnan ". Ang bulong ni beki. Ok ang reply ko.
nagpalit kami ng chair, although binabarge ko si matchong papa ay nakadistance ako at lumalaklak ng kape. Bigla siyang lumingn at binati ako. " first time mo sa kol center ?, mi-nute niya yung kausap niya. Chinika niya ako ng chinika at panay ang ngiti ni matcong papa. At dahil isa lang akong baklang hinampas sa lupa ay kinilig at nailang ako.
After ng barge:
Baklang wavemate: " bakla siguro yun' nung ako yung katabi, hindi manlang ako pinapansin ".
*Sa loob loob ko, bakla ingit kalang at FYI lang, ako ang bakla. Wagkasing ika subsob ang mukha pag hindi kakilala, mentain some distance para hindi matakot.
Siyempre straight yung tao at kitang kita nung tao na bakla ka tapos ganoon pa ang approach mo. theory of respect lang.
Nope hindi bakla si machong papa, lagi niyang kasamam ang gf niya. At kung bakla man siya ay wala akong pag-asa sa kanya. Hitsura ko lang . Isa lang akong baklang inihampas sa lupa.
I am not booksmart but I am a very logical and practical person. It's a gift that I learned to master.
Low and dry
It's been ages since I had my last meteor shower. Lately I have this urge to do it. I need some human touch, I need some affection, I need some sugar. I need some kilig, gusto ko ng Cynthia Patag moments, with matching stufftoy and a large ribbon sa buhok.
One of the boys
Nakakatuwa na nagwagwapuhan ang mga wavemates ko, konte lang ang gurls. Kaya naman isa ito sa dahilan kaya pumapasok pa ako. Sa grupo ay ako yung silent but deadly type, wala naman silang palag. Akala nga nila nung una pipe ako, pero sa totoo lang ay isa akong pepe na nagpapangap na titi. Masarap kasama ang boys sa yosi break at inuman, masarap tumawa at makinig sa pambabastos nila sa isat-isa. Hindi ko alam kung bakit takot silang biruin ako, wether or not bina-backstab nila ako, i really don't care. Ilang tumbling nalang ay madidisband na ang wave namin at madidistribute na kami sa ibat-ibang teams. Sarap magtrabaho pag- napapaligiran ka ng mga gwapo, nakakabawas ng stress, at nandyan narin yung occassional kilig sa pekpek pag-inaakbayan ka. Sarap magfinger sa restroom afterwards.
Wierdo umacting itong isang cutie pie, napapnsin ko na kung nasaan ako nandun siya. Hindi naman ako nag-aasume ng kung ano paman. Isa pa sa pinagtataka ko ay nag-stutter siya pag kausap ako. Malamang ay kinikilabutan siya sa pagmumukha ko. Mukha daw akong tomboy sabi nung isang baklang wavemate namin. Dedma lang ako, at least mukha lang ang tomboy. Mabait naman siya in fairness. Masaya kasama ang boys kasi, they like to front stab, they rarely backstab, mas balahura ang mga jokes nila kaya masaya.
21
Wave 21 ( pang 21 na grupo ). Sa second week ng training ay 21 nalang kaming natira naliggwak ang anim ( originally 27 kami ). Nung araw na nagtangalan ay pang 21 akong nagmock- call, yun kasi ang nabunot kong number. Feb, 21. 12:30 a.m ng maka- barge ko ang isang machong papa.
Hindi siya ang original kong ka barge nung oras na yun, kung hindi yung bakla kong ka wavemate. Babae ang ka barge ko. Nainis si baklang wavemate dahil hindi siya pinapansin ni matchong papa. Ni hello wala, naantipatikohan siya.
" daniel palit tayo, ang antipatiko nitong binabarge ko, hindi manlang ako tinitingnan ". Ang bulong ni beki. Ok ang reply ko.
nagpalit kami ng chair, although binabarge ko si matchong papa ay nakadistance ako at lumalaklak ng kape. Bigla siyang lumingn at binati ako. " first time mo sa kol center ?, mi-nute niya yung kausap niya. Chinika niya ako ng chinika at panay ang ngiti ni matcong papa. At dahil isa lang akong baklang hinampas sa lupa ay kinilig at nailang ako.
After ng barge:
Baklang wavemate: " bakla siguro yun' nung ako yung katabi, hindi manlang ako pinapansin ".
*Sa loob loob ko, bakla ingit kalang at FYI lang, ako ang bakla. Wagkasing ika subsob ang mukha pag hindi kakilala, mentain some distance para hindi matakot.
Siyempre straight yung tao at kitang kita nung tao na bakla ka tapos ganoon pa ang approach mo. theory of respect lang.
Nope hindi bakla si machong papa, lagi niyang kasamam ang gf niya. At kung bakla man siya ay wala akong pag-asa sa kanya. Hitsura ko lang . Isa lang akong baklang inihampas sa lupa.
I am not booksmart but I am a very logical and practical person. It's a gift that I learned to master.
Friday, September 7, 2012
donkey
Siya ang Isa sa dalawa kong Bestfriend na PLU, sobrang tagal na namin mag bestfriend. Mga 8 years na, pero recently, hindi na kami magkikita, kaya naman one of these days ay balak kung I-surprise visit ang Baklang mukhang kabayo.
*Take note ha, bakla siya at hindi babae, ginawa ko lang siyang babae sa mga drawings ko.
Kaya ko siya bestfriend ay simple lang...
Nope, mali ka ng iniisip, Ang iniisip mo siguro ay mukha siyang kabayo kaya ko siya naging bestfriend.. Mali Ka.
Asaran at pahiyaan to the max ang terms of endearment namin. Kabayo ang Tawag ko sa kaniya at paminsan ay Donkey; Yung sa Shrek. At sa akin kung anong tawag niya ay sa akin nalang Buwahaha.
Bago mag bagyong Ondoy ay nakunan ko pa sa cellphone ko ang ilan sa mga drawings ko niya.
[ Images Removed ]
*Take note ha, bakla siya at hindi babae, ginawa ko lang siyang babae sa mga drawings ko.
"My Bestfriend is nooot a hooooorrrsse! Hayoooppp!"
Thursday, September 6, 2012
b.i.t.c.h
Just heard this an hour ago. I was completely and utterly shocked. Are you serious? I repeatedly asked the person who told me the information. Let me take u back TWO years ago. This was a post from my previous blog.
Heres the story:
Yesterday i had a dispute with Tom, A Tikbalang looking old man.
He stinks like a coffin and his breath smells like garbage (for real).
He bullied me and pushed me to my limit, unleashing the monster in me.
I gave him a lesson that he would never forget.
===
Jan 2, 2008 Wednesday
He was about 45 minutes early.
Tom Tikbalang :" Anong nangyari sa PC mo? Bakit ka nakaupo dito sa station ko? "
Daniel:" Sira. May Virus".
TomTikbalang :"Putang ina naman nakakaistorbo!
Di ako umimik.
Strike one siya.
===
Jan 3, 2008 Thursday
He was about 30 minutes early.
Tom Tikbalang:" Nakakaistorbo! "
Umulit pa.
Tom Tikbalang:" Anu ba yan Nakakaistorbo! "
Di ako umimik.
Strike two na siya.
===
Jan 4, 2008
He was about an hour and 20 minutes early.
Tom Tikbalang:" Umalis kana Nakakaistorbo ka eh! "
" LUMIPAT KA NA! ".
Srtike Three! Blackout mode ako.
Daniel:" BAKET ORAS MO NABA "?
" AT BAKET AKO LILIPAT? "
*Hinawakan niya ang mukha ko paharap sa mukha niya (gently.
TomTikbalang : GALIT KA?!
Daniel: "HINDI AKO GALIT, OO GALIT AKO OBVIOUS BA?!
AT WAG MO NGA KONG HAHAWAKAN!!
Nagulat ang mga tao sa room at sabay msn sakin ni TL
" Anong gulo yan Daniel?. Naririnig ko boses mo mula dito.
nag explain ako kay ma'am.
After that ay bumalik si Tom at parang maamong tupang nag so sorry sakin.
But it was too late, dahil pinatawag na kami sa HR.
Nag attempt si Tom na baliktarin ako.
He was really lame for doing that, Because everyone in our room knows what hes been doing to me.
It was a dreaded day for him. Not knowing that he messed up with a monster.
===
Perfect timing, perfect assault. He never saw whats coming to him.
Everyone was surpised kung gaano ako katapang,
One thing is for sure. They haven't seen the worst of me.
Naalala ko tuloy ang nabangit ni Mugen sa isa sa mga blog entries niya
na ako ang pinaka warlang Plu sa shift namin
It's a compliment and it made me smile for awhile.
===
Although I learned today that he passed away last year. I didn't feel any regret not saying "Sorry". It was his fault at the time. I was just shocked but I don't feel sorry at all. Hey why would I in the first place?
Wherever he is right now, may his soul rest on pieces este' peace.
Do they give free dentures in the spirit world?
Heres the story:
Yesterday i had a dispute with Tom, A Tikbalang looking old man.
He stinks like a coffin and his breath smells like garbage (for real).
He bullied me and pushed me to my limit, unleashing the monster in me.
I gave him a lesson that he would never forget.
===
Jan 2, 2008 Wednesday
He was about 45 minutes early.
Tom Tikbalang :" Anong nangyari sa PC mo? Bakit ka nakaupo dito sa station ko? "
Daniel:" Sira. May Virus".
TomTikbalang :"Putang ina naman nakakaistorbo!
Di ako umimik.
Strike one siya.
===
Jan 3, 2008 Thursday
He was about 30 minutes early.
Tom Tikbalang:" Nakakaistorbo! "
Umulit pa.
Tom Tikbalang:" Anu ba yan Nakakaistorbo! "
Di ako umimik.
Strike two na siya.
===
Jan 4, 2008
He was about an hour and 20 minutes early.
Tom Tikbalang:" Umalis kana Nakakaistorbo ka eh! "
" LUMIPAT KA NA! ".
Srtike Three! Blackout mode ako.
Daniel:" BAKET ORAS MO NABA "?
" AT BAKET AKO LILIPAT? "
*Hinawakan niya ang mukha ko paharap sa mukha niya (gently.
TomTikbalang : GALIT KA?!
Daniel: "HINDI AKO GALIT, OO GALIT AKO OBVIOUS BA?!
AT WAG MO NGA KONG HAHAWAKAN!!
Nagulat ang mga tao sa room at sabay msn sakin ni TL
" Anong gulo yan Daniel?. Naririnig ko boses mo mula dito.
nag explain ako kay ma'am.
After that ay bumalik si Tom at parang maamong tupang nag so sorry sakin.
But it was too late, dahil pinatawag na kami sa HR.
Nag attempt si Tom na baliktarin ako.
He was really lame for doing that, Because everyone in our room knows what hes been doing to me.
It was a dreaded day for him. Not knowing that he messed up with a monster.
===
Perfect timing, perfect assault. He never saw whats coming to him.
Everyone was surpised kung gaano ako katapang,
One thing is for sure. They haven't seen the worst of me.
Naalala ko tuloy ang nabangit ni Mugen sa isa sa mga blog entries niya
na ako ang pinaka warlang Plu sa shift namin
It's a compliment and it made me smile for awhile.
===
Although I learned today that he passed away last year. I didn't feel any regret not saying "Sorry". It was his fault at the time. I was just shocked but I don't feel sorry at all. Hey why would I in the first place?
Wherever he is right now, may his soul rest on pieces este' peace.
Do they give free dentures in the spirit world?
Wednesday, September 5, 2012
maybe your a firework
Nakareceive ako ng letter mula sa last kung pinagtrabahuhan, pinagrereport ako, nabasa ni Inay ang letter
"Nak, baki kanaman nag palit ng trabaho? wag ganyan, hindi ka aasenso niyan, bakit ka kasi nagresign,Paano ang benefits, tumatanda kana! Maganda na yung company mo ah."" Paano ang future mo niyan?"
Sagot ko:
"Ilang beses ko bang sasabihin sa inyo na hindi masaya magtrabaho sa Kol senter, sobrang nakakastress, try mo paminsan, AT isa pa walang future sa Kol senter!"
"Hayaan mo pag-nakachamba ako ng madaling account, hindi nako aalis doon, magpakailanman!"
Hindi ko sinasadyang masagot si Inay. Paulit-ulit nalang kasi, nakakarindi na.
Magulo na nga ang utak ko, lalo pa niyang pinagugulo, ayan tuloy.
Diko sinasadya, and I felt guilty afterwards.I felt horrible. Anong magagawa ko tao lang ako.
OO na, ang galing galing kong anak sa mga sinabi ko.
Afterwards ay dumerecho ako sa kuwarto ni-lock ang pinto, binuksan ang component, tinodo ang volume at pinatugtog ng bongang bonga ang kanta ni Katy Perry na Fireworks"
Nagkakanta ako habang tumatalon sa kama ng bongang-bongang.
Sa palagay ko ay nabulabog ang buong neighborhood sa ginawa ko.
Sige ako na, lagi nalang ako.
Si Daniel na ubod ng payat.
Si Daniel na ubod ng hagard.
Si Daniel na nagpagkakamalan ng bungo
Si Daniel na nagpagkakamalang may tuberculosis
Si Daniel na nagpagkakamalang Rugby Girl
ETO HITSURA NG KATAWAN KO PAG WALANG DAMIT, LUPIT DIBA?
"Nak, baki kanaman nag palit ng trabaho? wag ganyan, hindi ka aasenso niyan, bakit ka kasi nagresign,Paano ang benefits, tumatanda kana! Maganda na yung company mo ah."" Paano ang future mo niyan?"
Sagot ko:
"Ilang beses ko bang sasabihin sa inyo na hindi masaya magtrabaho sa Kol senter, sobrang nakakastress, try mo paminsan, AT isa pa walang future sa Kol senter!"
"Hayaan mo pag-nakachamba ako ng madaling account, hindi nako aalis doon, magpakailanman!"
Hindi ko sinasadyang masagot si Inay. Paulit-ulit nalang kasi, nakakarindi na.
Magulo na nga ang utak ko, lalo pa niyang pinagugulo, ayan tuloy.
Diko sinasadya, and I felt guilty afterwards.I felt horrible. Anong magagawa ko tao lang ako.
OO na, ang galing galing kong anak sa mga sinabi ko.
Afterwards ay dumerecho ako sa kuwarto ni-lock ang pinto, binuksan ang component, tinodo ang volume at pinatugtog ng bongang bonga ang kanta ni Katy Perry na Fireworks"
Nagkakanta ako habang tumatalon sa kama ng bongang-bongang.
Sa palagay ko ay nabulabog ang buong neighborhood sa ginawa ko.
Sige ako na, lagi nalang ako.
Si Daniel na ubod ng payat.
Si Daniel na ubod ng hagard.
Si Daniel na nagpagkakamalan ng bungo
Si Daniel na nagpagkakamalang may tuberculosis
Si Daniel na nagpagkakamalang Rugby Girl
ETO HITSURA NG KATAWAN KO PAG WALANG DAMIT, LUPIT DIBA?
Tuesday, September 4, 2012
boy stuck up and lady chups part 5
[ boy stuck up ]: Kabayo ka ba?
[ lady chups ]: Hmmm Vhaket?
[ boy stuck up ]: Gusto kasi kitang sakyan eh...
[ lady chups ]: Awww how sweet! Love mo na ako??
[ boy stuck up ]: Gusto kitang literal na sakyan at patakbuhin ng 100 kilometro, katulad ng isang tunay na kabayo. Tanga ka talaga!
[ lady chups ]: Uy pasimple kapa gusto mo talaga akong patungan at anakan!
[ boy stuck up ]: Hayop ka talagang animal ka! Ang baboy mo!
===
[ boy stuck up ]: Ipis kaba?
[ lady chups ]: Ketvah?
[ boy stuck up ]: Sarap kasing hampasin ng tsinelas ng mukha mo eh. Lalong lalo na yang nguso mong involuntary ang pagalaw. Haha!
[ lady chups ]: Corn kaba!
[ boy stuck up ]: Pak you gago! Sumasagot kapa! Ikaw ang Corny jan!
[ lady chups ]: Hmmm Vhaket?
[ boy stuck up ]: Gusto kasi kitang sakyan eh...
[ lady chups ]: Awww how sweet! Love mo na ako??
[ boy stuck up ]: Gusto kitang literal na sakyan at patakbuhin ng 100 kilometro, katulad ng isang tunay na kabayo. Tanga ka talaga!
[ lady chups ]: Uy pasimple kapa gusto mo talaga akong patungan at anakan!
[ boy stuck up ]: Hayop ka talagang animal ka! Ang baboy mo!
===
[ boy stuck up ]: Ipis kaba?
[ lady chups ]: Ketvah?
[ boy stuck up ]: Sarap kasing hampasin ng tsinelas ng mukha mo eh. Lalong lalo na yang nguso mong involuntary ang pagalaw. Haha!
[ lady chups ]: Corn kaba!
[ boy stuck up ]: Pak you gago! Sumasagot kapa! Ikaw ang Corny jan!
Monday, September 3, 2012
fear factor
Ipis everywhere. Nagtambak na naman sila utol ng hugasin sa bahay. Kapitbahay lang namin sila. Ang kakapal ng mukha. At dahil ayokong lamunin ng daga at ipis ang bahay namin ay hinugasan ko na lahat ng dishes. Nilinis ko na rin ang kusina, habang inaayos ang mga kung ano- anong nakakalat sa kitchen habang nag-aayos ay napansin ko ang isang maliit na mangkok na may takip na platito, nasa sulok ito ng kusina at hindi kapansinpansin. Pag-bukas ko nito ay bongang-bongang binulaga ako ng isang katutak na maggots. Puta! 1 week old natong adobo na to, nakanampucha talaga, ang baho! ( Sa kasamaang palad ay nasinghot ko ang amoy na parang lason na gumuhit sa passage way ng lungs at ilong ko )
Binabagabag rin ako ng mantsa sa hagdanan, Alam kong tae ito, maliban kasi sa greenish na color nito, ay distinct ang texture nito. Kaya naman maski nasusuka ako ay, nagsuot ako ng agwantes, improvised na gasmask habang hawak ang brush at isang maliit na timba na may zonrox. Iniskoba ko ito, maski na fear factor ang dating nito sa akin. Hindot na tae yan parang bubblegum na ang pagkadikit.
Labag man sa kalooban ko ay ako narin ang nagwawalis ng tae mg aso, tuwing dudumi ito.
Nasa bakasyon pa kasi ang parents ko.
Hindi talaga ako housewife material.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"BIANCA KING"
Depress depressan ang lola mo. Pagkatapos pagpaguran ang pag-aaply sa isang bigating callcenter ay iririject lang pala ako. Pinaka-final interview na, sumablay pa ako. Hindi ako gusto nung nag-final interview.
11:00 p.m na ng natapos ang final interview. Sa sama ng loob ko ay diretso ako sa aking favorite place, which is PL1. May stand up commedian noong araw na iyon. Chempong kaunti lang ang tao, kaya naman for the first time ay naglakas ng loob akong maki-jam sa mga standup commedians. For once in my life, gusto kong ma- Okray ng bongang bonga. Gusto kong marinig lahat ng totoong panlalait nila.
Na-surprise ako ng bongang-bonga.
Na imbes na laitin ako to the max at durugin ang pagkatao ko, ay kinompliment pa ako ng isa sa stand up commedians. Mukha daw akong babae, kamukha ko daw si Bianca King.
Nagbiro pa ang isa na kilala niya daw akong veterana sa mga gay beauty pageants at nagpapangap lang akong paminta.
Lalo silang naloka ng kantahin ko ang Through the fire. Birit kung birit version. Thumbling ang mga kabayo.
Binabagabag rin ako ng mantsa sa hagdanan, Alam kong tae ito, maliban kasi sa greenish na color nito, ay distinct ang texture nito. Kaya naman maski nasusuka ako ay, nagsuot ako ng agwantes, improvised na gasmask habang hawak ang brush at isang maliit na timba na may zonrox. Iniskoba ko ito, maski na fear factor ang dating nito sa akin. Hindot na tae yan parang bubblegum na ang pagkadikit.
Labag man sa kalooban ko ay ako narin ang nagwawalis ng tae mg aso, tuwing dudumi ito.
Nasa bakasyon pa kasi ang parents ko.
Hindi talaga ako housewife material.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"BIANCA KING"
Depress depressan ang lola mo. Pagkatapos pagpaguran ang pag-aaply sa isang bigating callcenter ay iririject lang pala ako. Pinaka-final interview na, sumablay pa ako. Hindi ako gusto nung nag-final interview.
11:00 p.m na ng natapos ang final interview. Sa sama ng loob ko ay diretso ako sa aking favorite place, which is PL1. May stand up commedian noong araw na iyon. Chempong kaunti lang ang tao, kaya naman for the first time ay naglakas ng loob akong maki-jam sa mga standup commedians. For once in my life, gusto kong ma- Okray ng bongang bonga. Gusto kong marinig lahat ng totoong panlalait nila.
Na-surprise ako ng bongang-bonga.
Na imbes na laitin ako to the max at durugin ang pagkatao ko, ay kinompliment pa ako ng isa sa stand up commedians. Mukha daw akong babae, kamukha ko daw si Bianca King.
Nagbiro pa ang isa na kilala niya daw akong veterana sa mga gay beauty pageants at nagpapangap lang akong paminta.
Lalo silang naloka ng kantahin ko ang Through the fire. Birit kung birit version. Thumbling ang mga kabayo.
Saturday, September 1, 2012
chicken soup
Isang araw habang kami ay nanood ng television ng aking ina ay biglaan siyang nagkuwento.
Tungkol ito sa isang sa Isang Nanay at ang kanyang anak na teen-ager na dalagita. Si dalagita daw ay pasaway. Ayaw pumasok sa skul at hilig ang ay ang pagtambay at panlalalake. Lagi rin daw naglalayas ang dalagita at paminsan hindi umuuwi ng ilang araw. At siyempre mabaliw-baliw daw ang ina sa paghahanap at pagaalala.
Hangang isang isang araw ay hinahabol ng ina ang anak. Sa highway naghabulan ang mag-ina.
At sa kahahabol ng Ina sa pasaway na malanding anak na menor de edad ay nabundol ng taxi ang Ina.
Ayun. Commatose daw yung Ina.
Napagisip ko na mabiting anak parin ako kumpara dun sa dalagitang yun. Hindi man ako makapag-contribute sa mga gastusin dito sa bahay sa ngayon ay masasabi ko na yun lang ang masama sa akin when it comes to my relationship with my parents.
Sa maniwala kayot hindi ay hindi ako lumalabas ng bahay nung nag-high school na ako.
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